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The Looking Glass Self Exercise, Lecture notes of Dynamics

Theory of Self. Cooley theorized that individuals develop their identity in response to how they understand others' perceptions of themselves (Cooley (1909).

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The Looking Glass Self Exercise
Adrianne M. Crawford Fletcher developed The Looking Glass Self Exercise from Charles Horton
Cooley's (1902) Theory of Self. Cooley theorized that individuals develop their identity in
response to how they understand others' perceptions of themselves (Cooley (1909).
Specifically, interactions between individuals and groups hence have a tremendous influence
on one's socialization (Marshall, 1998).
Negative interactions based on racial, gender, gender-identity, ethnicity, and culture are
increasing in the U.S. and abroad. Achieving collegial, and authentic civil group dynamics is
tantamount at the outset of training intended to improve the cohesion and relationships in the
group. This exercise connects group members to one another very quickly as assumptions
come to the fore and fade to black, before similarities and like-mindedness take center stage,
creating new realities.
The Looking Glass Self Exercise and Theory of Self
Each to each a looking glass,
reflects the other that doth pass
I am not what I think I am
I am not what you think I am
Rather, I am what I think
you think I am
(Cooley, 1902)
Goals
• To create a group dynamic in which participants are willing to honestly and thoughtfully
engage with one another;
• To create a group dynamic in which participants socially affirm one another, and are more
empathetic toward one another;
• To create a group dynamic in which participants engage with one another in a relationally-
responsible manner.
Rational
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The Looking Glass Self Exercise Adrianne M. Crawford Fletcher developed The Looking Glass Self Exercise from Charles Horton Cooley's (1902) Theory of Self. Cooley theorized that individuals develop their identity in response to how they understand others' perceptions of themselves (Cooley (1909). Specifically, interactions between individuals and groups hence have a tremendous influence on one's socialization (Marshall, 1998). Negative interactions based on racial, gender, gender-identity, ethnicity, and culture are increasing in the U.S. and abroad. Achieving collegial, and authentic civil group dynamics is tantamount at the outset of training intended to improve the cohesion and relationships in the group. This exercise connects group members to one another very quickly as assumptions come to the fore and fade to black, before similarities and like-mindedness take center stage, creating new realities. The Looking Glass Self Exercise and Theory of Self Each to each a looking glass, reflects the other that doth pass I am not what I think I am I am not what you think I am Rather, I am what I think you think I am (Cooley, 1902) Goals

  • To create a group dynamic in which participants are willing to honestly and thoughtfully engage with one another;
  • To create a group dynamic in which participants socially affirm one another, and are more empathetic toward one another;
  • To create a group dynamic in which participants engage with one another in a relationally- responsible manner. Rational

The Looking Glass Self Exercise is a practical tool for thinking and talking about the influence of stereotypes with group participants. It is also a way to break down barriers that may exist between group participants as a result of differing cultures, ethnicities, and gender identities , etc.. Cooley's (1902;1909) concepts of 'the looking glass self', 'primary groups, and 'secondary groups' all speak to the influence others have upon the individual. Marshall (1998) specifically noted that interactions between individuals and social groups have a tremendous influence on socialization. Lastly, this exercise is effective because it is couched in storytelling. Participants become less anxious as they tell their own stories, and listen to the stories of others. This exercise is an indirect way of discussing the ‘third-rail’ topics of race, gender, ethnicity, etc.. Gyasi (2016), author of Homegoing, noted that storytelling creates new histories, and as mentioned above, new realities. Storytelling is also a political act that helps us to realize our past (Gyasi, 2016). It also helps us to co-create our future! The narrative or story, the primary concept in this exercise, becomes a tool of empowerment, which builds relationship from the ground up, enhancing group dynamics. Enhancement of Group Dynamics The Looking Glass Self Exercise is an excellent exercise for enhancing group dynamics at the beginning of a training for participants who are different from one another. This exercise allows for the discussion and management of perceived differences, whether they be cultural, gender identity, ethnicity, class, etc. Setting-up the Looking Glass Self Exercise Provide the following instructions to the group. This exercise will take approximately 30 minutes. The exercise is set up in three 8-10 minute segments. Give each participant about 5 minutes to ‘tell their story’ within segment 1 and 2. Provide ‘time warnings’ to ensure that each

  • The facilitator encourages participants to debrief, saying: “I’m wondering who might be willing to share reflections from this exercise?)
    • What was your most difficult discovery?
    • Do you believe what you heard to be true about you?
  • The last two questions should be asked to the same person:
    • What is it that you want people to think about you?
    • Tell us who you are? Encourage several people to answer these questions. Exercise Conclusions Provide a summary of the exercise goals and the learning that was intended. We base our behavior on what we think others think of us, thus social interaction becomes a looking glass, a mirror that informs how we see ourselves. The looking-glass self comprises three main components that are unique to humans (Shaffer 2005).
    1. We imagine how we must appear to others in a social situation.
    2. We imagine and react to what we feel their judgment of that appearance must be.
    3. We develop our sense of self and respond through these perceived judgments of others. You might acknowledge that this exercise creates a shift in groups through:
    4. The creation of a safe environment.
    5. An increase in positive group dynamics including honest and thoughtful engagement, increased empathy, social affirmation, and relational responsibility.
    6. An openness and willingness to discuss difficult topics Positive group dynamics begin to emerge when one recognizes the strong influence of individual and social interactions. Favorable group dynamics further emerge in the face of transformative dialogue, which include “... relational responsibility, self-expression, affirmation, coordination, reflexivity, and the co-creation of new realities” (Gergen, McNamee & Barrett, 2001, p. 704). In this brief exercise participants can discuss opposing views, stereotypes and barriers based upon how they think others see them.

References Cooley, C. (1902). Human nature and the social order. New York: Scribner's Sons Cooley, C. (1909). Social organization. New York: Scribner's Sons. Gergen, K. J., McNamee, S. & Barrett, f. (2001). Toward a vocabulary of transformative dialogue, International Journal of Public Administration 24 (7), 679-707. Gyasi, Y. (2016). Homegoing. New York:Knopf Marshall, G. (1998). Charles Horton Cooley. In Oxford dictionary of sociology (pp. 120) (2nd ed.). (2nd ed.). Oxford: Oxford University Press. Retrieved February 11, 2009, from http://www.soci.canterbury.ac.nz/resources/ biograph/ cooley.shtml Shaffer, Leigh S. (January 2005). "From mirror self-recognition to the looking-glass self: exploring the Justification Hypothesis". Journal of Clinical Psychology. 61 (1): 47–65.