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Argument Essay Peer Review Worksheet Jorge Soria ENC 1102 (710753) Professor Murphy William Aug 4, 2023 ENC 1102 Informative Essay Peer Review Reviewers Name: Jorge Soria Authors Name: Chris Anaya Introduction Does the introduction grab your attention? If so, how does it go about doing this? If not, how might you suggest the author could hook the attention of their readers? Yes, he makes a declaration at the outset of his piece. This sentence successfully draws my attention. Find and underline the thesis. Is the thesis clear, specific, and understandable? Does it argue something (i.e., is it an opinion rather than a fact)? Does the thesis offer the authors opinion on the benefits and/or drawbacks on the technology? If not, how might the author make changes in order to produce a stronger thesis? “A 1955 amendment increased the minimum wage to $1.00 an hour with no changes in coverage.” The topic of minimum wage is a topic of much heated debate in economic and normal everyday social circles. Supporters of minimum wage argue that raising the minimum wage is essential for alleviating poverty, reducing income inequality, and improving the overall well- being of workers. On the other hand, antagonists of minimum wage argue that increasing the minimum wage may lead to negative effects on employment and small businesses. This essay will examine the arguments against minimum wage while considering evidence from various research studies to determine whether the minimum wage should be increased or not. I think it's a good thesis, but it could be improved. Does the author successfully give a preview of their paper and provide background for the topic? (i.e., Does the author provide sufficient preliminary information about the technological advancement they are discussing?) If not, what information should the writer include that is missing? In my opinion, the author doesn't need to mention the name of the article again since it has already been stated. However, I suggest that the author provide more clarity on the factors that
made the article convincing, as I have previously mentioned. Body Does each paragraph contain only 1 main idea and topic sentence? (In other words, make sure that the author does not discuss a new, unrelated point without beginning a new paragraph.) If any of the paragraphs contain multiple main topics and/or topic sentences, suggest where the author might place paragraph breaks or what information the author should omit. According to me, some paragraphs concentrated on a single primary topic, while others appeared to be summaries with only a few sentences emphasizing the force of the argument. It seems to need some minor alterations. Does the author incorporate at least three outside sources into their argument? Does the author use sufficient evidence (i.e., quotations) from these sources and/or personal experience to support their claims? If not, what ideas need more evidentiary support? Although the author cited sources frequently throughout the book, I thought it odd that nothing was in quotation marks. I was left wondering why they made that decision. Conclusion Does the conclusion successfully summarize the main ideas of the essay? I'm afraid the proposed techniques require a more detailed description. It would be helpful if we could get more information on how they work and how they could be implemented and improve the bottom line. Does the author end the essay with a question, saying, anecdote, call to action, etc. that gets you to think about the topic even after you’ve finished reading? If not, do you have any recommendations for how the author may accomplish this? The author seems to see that the minimum wage debate remains contentious, with valid arguments on both sides. While raising the minimum wage has the potential to lift workers out of poverty and improve their well-being, concerns about potential adverse effects on employment and small businesses must be addressed. To strike a balance, policymakers should consider region-specific minimum wage adjustments and complementary policies like the EITC and skills development programs. By thoughtfully addressing these issues, society can strive towards a more just and equitable economic system that benefits both workers and employers alike. General Are there any spelling or grammar errors that need to be corrected? Does the writing ever become confusing or vague? If so, indicate where on the rough draft, as well as suggesting some ways the writer might fix these issues.
Find and underline the thesis. Is the thesis clear, specific, and understandable? Does it argue something (i.e., is it an opinion rather than a fact)? Does the thesis offer the authors opinion on the benefits and/or drawbacks on the technology? If not, how might the author make changes in order to produce a stronger thesis? There’s no agreement on whether current generation “AI” are sentient or not so the issue of AI owning or having their own copyright protections is not being addressed presently, although it is being considered since it is thought to be a matter of time (Glazer). Copyright law is complex and there are specific variables that can affect the eligibility of an application, including individual decisions by officials on a per application basis. Much of the copyright issues stem from the training sets for generative AI which can sometimes include copyrighted material without permission from the copyright holder(s) (Dubey). There is even debate as to whom is liable when an AI crosses an ethical line; the company that created it, or the user. The issue is complex with many layers, and as time goes on it will have greater and greater impacts on our lives. I think it's a good thesis, but it could be improved. Does the author successfully give a preview of their paper and provide background for the topic? (i.e., Does the author provide sufficient preliminary information about the technological advancement they are discussing?) If not, what information should the writer include that is missing? It seems like the article's name can be left out since the author has already mentioned it. However, the author should provide more clarity on what made the piece persuasive, as I have note. Body Does each paragraph contain only 1 main idea and topic sentence? (In other words, make sure that the author does not discuss a new, unrelated point without beginning a new paragraph.) If any of the paragraphs contain multiple main topics and/or topic sentences, suggest where the author might place paragraph breaks or what information the author should omit. In my opinion, certain paragraphs focused on one main idea, while others seemed to serve as summaries with only a few phrases highlighting the strength of the argument. It appears to require some minor adjustments. Does the author incorporate at least three outside sources into their argument? Does the author use sufficient evidence (i.e., quotations) from these sources and/or personal experience to support their claims? If not, what ideas need more evidentiary support? I noticed that the author seems to have included citations throughout the text, but I didn't see any quotation marks. I'm not entirely sure why they chose to do this. Conclusion
Does the conclusion successfully summarize the main ideas of the essay? No, but I think additional information needs to be provided on the suggested techniques. To ensure the effectiveness and accuracy of the methods being employed, it is essential to have a full understanding of them. Perhaps by delving deeper into the intricacies of these strategies, we can broaden our discussion on the subject and improve the conclusion. Does the author end the essay with a question, saying, anecdote, call to action, etc. that gets you to think about the topic even after you’ve finished reading? If not, do you have any recommendations for how the author may accomplish this? I think the author should finish the essay so I can give my argument. General Are there any spelling or grammar errors that need to be corrected? Does the writing ever become confusing or vague? If so, indicate where on the rough draft, as well as suggesting some ways the writer might fix these issues. The article suggests that the author may need to concentrate on enhancing his writing's grammar and clarity. The written material must be simple to read and grasp, thus the author could profit from some editing and modifications. Are the outside sources properly quoted and cited within the text (in addition to the inclusion of a work cited entry at the end of the essay)? If not, make suggestions to help the writer correct the format of their quotation and/or citations. When citing sources within an essay, it's important to include the author's last name and the year of publication in the citation. This not only gives credit to the original source but also allows readers to easily locate the source material if they want to read more about the topic. Is the essay well organized, presenting a logical sequence and flow to the ideas and claims that make up the essay’s main argument? Does the author utilize transitional words and phrases to maneuver between sentences, paragraphs, topics, etc.? If not, suggest where the author might improve their organization as well as where the author might include some transitional devices. I think the organization of the content could benefit from some improvements. It could be helpful to incorporate different transitional words to make the flow more engaging and easier to follow.
any of the paragraphs contain multiple main topics and/or topic sentences, suggest where the author might place paragraph breaks or what information the author should omit. In my opinion, certain paragraphs center around a singular concept, while others come across as summaries with only a couple of statements highlighting the strength of the argument. To me, it appears that some minor adjustments are necessary. Does the author incorporate at least three outside sources into their argument? Does the author use sufficient evidence (i.e., quotations) from these sources and/or personal experience to support their claims? If not, what ideas need more evidentiary support? I noticed that the author included citations throughout their text, but I found it strange that nothing was in quotations. It left me wondering why they chose to do it that way. Conclusion Does the conclusion successfully summarize the main ideas of the essay? No, but I think the techniques proposed need to be described in more detail. It's important to have a clear understanding of what methods are being used in order to ensure their effectiveness and accuracy. Perhaps we can explore this topic further and delve into the specifics of these techniques and improve the conclusion. Does the author end the essay with a question, saying, anecdote, call to action, etc. that gets you to think about the topic even after you’ve finished reading? If not, do you have any recommendations for how the author may accomplish this? Reading both of these articles together has given me a much clearer understanding of the effects of social media on mental health. The first article gives a clear presentation of how the perceptions of social media and mental health by adolescents show that social media might not actually have an impact on mental health. The second article shows that social media use alone does not have a directly negative impact on mental health. The two articles compliment each other in that one shows that how the perceptions of social media and mental health do not quite line up with reality and the other gives evidence to support that fact. Both articles agree that there is not enough research on the subject and that more research needs to be done on the way people use social media instead of just how much people use it. Reading both of these articles has helped me conclude that social media use cannot be directly correlated to negative mental health and that the general public needs to be better educated on the subject. General Are there any spelling or grammar errors that need to be corrected? Does the writing ever become confusing or vague? If so, indicate where on the rough draft, as well as suggesting some
ways the writer might fix these issues. According to the essay, it appears that the author needs to focus on enhancing his writing's grammar and clarity. It may be beneficial for the author to make a few tweaks and adjustments because the written material must be simple to read and follow. Are the outside sources properly quoted and cited within the text (in addition to the inclusion of a work cited entry at the end of the essay)? If not, make suggestions to help the writer correct the format of their quotation and/or citations. It's crucial to provide the author's last name and the year of publication when citing sources in an essay. By doing this, readers are not only given credit for the original source but are also given a simple way to find it if they wish to read more about the subject. Is the essay well organized, presenting a logical sequence and flow to the ideas and claims that make up the essay’s main argument? Does the author utilize transitional words and phrases to maneuver between sentences, paragraphs, topics, etc.? If not, suggest where the author might improve their organization as well as where the author might include some transitional devices. I think the structure could benefit from some improvement. It seems like there's room for more diversity in the transitional words used throughout the piece.
