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Steps Towards Healing, Relationship Violence - Paper | ACAD WRIT, Papers of Creative writing

Material Type: Paper; Class: Academic Writing Seminar; Subject: Academic Writing Seminar; University: Regent University; Term: Unknown 2004;

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Uploaded on 08/18/2009

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Relationship
Violence: The
Deadly Truth
“Over 4.4 million physical assaults are
committed against women by
an intimate partner annually.”
~Center for Disease Control and Prevention “Costs of Intimate Partner Vio lence
Against Women in the United States,” 2003
~STEPS TOWARD HEALING~
Regent University
Psychological Services Center
(757) 226-4488
TOP 10
WARNING SIGNS
1. Emotionally abuses you (insults, belittles, degrades,
ignores, pouts or gets angry when you initiate an action
or idea).
2. Tries to control elements of your life or relationship
which involves telling you who you may be friends with,
or how you should dress.
3. Berates or talks negatively about women in general.
4. Demonstrates jealously for no reason.
5.Thinks poorly of himself and guards his masculinity
by acting tough
6. Berates you for not wanting to get drunk, get high,
have sex, or go with him to an isolated or personal
place.
7. Is physically violent to you or others, even if it's
"just" grabbing and pushing to get his way.
8. Invades your "personal space" (sits too close, speaks
as if he knows you much better than he does, touches
you when you tell him not to). Acts in an intimidating
manner toward you.
9. Demonstrates the inability to handle sexual and emo-
tional frustrations without becoming angry.
10. Makes you feel like there is no way out of the rela-
tionship.
Take a step, make a fresh start and face the truth. If you or
someone you know is currently dealing with these or similar
issues, please contact: Regent University– Psychological
Services Center at (757) 226-4488 for more assistance.
“For the Lord God will help Me; Therefore I will not
be disgraced; Therefore I have set my face like a
flint, and know that I will not be ashamed.”
Isaiah 50:7 (NKJV)
Brochure Author: Traycie L. Tonge, 2004
Series Editors: La Trelle D. Jackson, Ph.D. &
Mary Beth Covert, M.A.
Published by: Regent University Psychological Services
Center, 1000 Regent University Dr, CRB - 188
Virginia Beach, VA 23464
Many gain strength in assisting other
people in need. Whether you have
survived… or know someone who has
dealt with domestic violence, con-
sider the following list of things you
can do to make a difference:
Get involved and volunteer at shelters
or community based programs that
offer assistance to individuals in abu-
sive situations.
Lend your support to organizations
that support Domestic Violence
Awareness Month.
Give your time, talents, financial sup-
port, or donations to your local shelter
or transitional housing facility.
Lend your ear at a 24-Hour Hotline.
Become an advocate with Stop the
Violence.
Continue to pray for peace in the
world, your country, your neighbor-
hood, and your relationships.
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RelationshipViolence: TheDeadly Truth “Over 4.4 million physical assaults arecommitted against women byan intimate partner annually.”~Center for Disease Control and Prevention “Costs of Intimate Partner ViolenceAgainst Women in the United States,” 2003

~STEPS TOWARD HEALING~

Regent University Psychological Services Center(757) 226-

TOP 10WARNING SIGNS 1. Emotionally abuses you (insults, belittles, degrades,ignores, pouts or gets angry when you initiate an actionor idea).2. Tries to control elements of your life or relationshipwhich involves telling you who you may be friends with,or how you should dress.3. Berates or talks negatively about women in general.4. Demonstrates jealously for no reason.5.Thinks poorly of himself and guards his masculinityby acting tough6. Berates you for not wanting to get drunk, get high,have sex, or go with him to an isolated or personalplace.7. Is physically violent to you or others, even if it's"just" grabbing and pushing to get his way.8. Invades your "personal space" (sits too close, speaksas if he knows you much better than he does, touchesyou when you tell him not to). Acts in an intimidatingmanner toward you.9. Demonstrates the inability to handle sexual and emo-tional frustrations without becoming angry.10. Makes you feel like there is no way out of the rela-tionship.

Take a step, make a fresh start and face the truth. If you orsomeone you know is currently dealing with these or similarissues, please contact: Regent University– PsychologicalServices Center^ at (757) 226-4488 for more assistance.

“For the Lord God will help Me; Therefore I will notbe disgraced; Therefore I have set my face like aflint, and know that I will not be ashamed.”Isaiah 50:7 (NKJV) Brochure Author: Traycie L. Tonge, 2004Series Editors: La Trelle D. Jackson, Ph.D. &Mary Beth Covert, M.A.Published by: Regent University Psychological ServicesCenter, 1000 Regent University Dr, CRB - 188Virginia Beach, VA 23464

Many gain strength in assisting otherpeople in need.

Whether you have

survived… or know someone who hasdealt with domestic violence, con-sider the following

list of things youcan do to make a difference:

-^ Get involved and volunteer at sheltersor community based programs thatoffer assistance to individuals in abu-sive situations. •^ Lend your support to organizationsthat support Domestic ViolenceAwareness Month. •^ Give your time, talents, financial sup-port, or donations to your local shelteror transitional housing facility. •^ Lend your ear at a 24-Hour Hotline. •^ Become an advocate with Stop theViolence. •^ Continue to pray for peace in theworld, your country, your neighbor-hood, and your relationships.

What Should I Know About Relationship Violence?efinition D^^ Sexual violence isa sex act completed or attemptedagainst a vic-tim’s will orwhen a victimis unable toconsent dueto age, ill-ness, disabil-ity, or theinfluence ofalcohol or What is Sexual other drugs. Violence? Do You It may in- See the Signs? volve actualor threatened physical force, useof guns or other weapons, coer-cion, intimidation, or pressure. Sexual violence also includes in-tentional touching of the genitals,anus, groin, or breast against avictim’s will or when a victim isunable to consent.^ Also, voyeur-ism, exposure to exhibitionism, orundesired exposure to pornogra-phy are considered acts of sexualviolence.^ The perpetrator of sex-ual violence may be a stranger,friend, family member, or inti-mate partner.

W^

ho are the victims? •^ Eight-five percent of domesticviolence victims are^ women.^ (Bureau of Justice Statistics, Factbook: Violence ByIntimates, 1998, NCJ-167237)

-^ Women^ of^ all^ socio-economic

groups^ can^ experience abuse. However, women in poverty face particular hard-ships and challenges when they try to leave abusive rela-tionships because they lack the resources they need tosupport^ themselves^ and^

their^ children.^ (Family Violence Prevention Fund,

“Speaking Up,” Vol. 8, Issue 6, 1998) • In^ almost^ nine^ out^ of^ ten

incidents^ of^ domestic^ elder

abuse and neglect, the perpetrator is a family member.(1998 National Elder Abuse Incidence Study) • Domestic violence among gay and lesbian couples occursin^ approximately^ 25-^

percent^ of^ relationships—the same^ statistical^ frequency

as^ in^ heterosexual^ relation- ships. However, women are nearly three times more likelyto report being victimized by a male partner than by afemale partner and men are nearly twice as likely to re-port being victimized by a male partner than by a femalepartner. These findings suggest that men primarily perpe-trate violence, whether against male or female partners.(US Department of Justice, Extent, Nature, and Consequences of Intimate Partner Violence: Findings from theNational Violence Against Women Survey, July 2000) U.S. Department of Justice. Criminal Victimization 2000: Changes 1999–2000 with trends 1993–2000. Washington (DC): U.S. Government PrintingOffice; 2001. Publication No. NCJ 187007 Available from: URL: http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/bjs/abstract/cv00.htm Tjaden P, Thoennes N. Full Report of the Prevalence, Incidence, and Consequences of Violence Against Women: Findings from the NationalViolence Against Women Survey. Report for grant 93-IJ-CX-0012, funded by the National Institute of Justice and the Centers for Disease

Control and Prevention. Washington (DC): National Institute of Justice; 2000.

Relationship Between Victim & Perpetrator Most perpetrators know their victims. According tothe 2000 National Crime Victimization Survey, 62%of rape and sexual assault victims knew the perpe-trator.^ More^ than^ 40%^ of^^ What Life-Skills Do I Need? • Anger management (John 4:2) • Communication skills (I John 4:11) • Stress management (I Cor. 6:19) • Decision Making & Problem Solvingskills (Psalm 27:14) Resources: If you currently believe that you are,or may become a victim of domestic violence,contact the National Domestic Violence Hotlineat:1-800-799-SAFE (7233)

rapes^ and^ sexual^ as- saults came at the hands of a person the femalevictim called a friend or acquaintance. Female vic-tims identified intimate partners as the perpetratorin 18% of rapes and sexual assaults (DepartmentOf Justice 2001). In^ the^ National^ Violence

Against^ Women^ Survey, approximately 25% of women and 8% of men saidthey were raped and/or physically assaulted by acurrent^ or^ former^ spouse,

cohabiting^ partner,^ or date in their lifetimes.

The survey estimates that more^ than^ 300,000^ intimate

partner^ rapes^ occur each^ year^ against^ women

18 and^ older.^ (Tjaden 2000). Violence againstwomen is present inevery country, cuttingacross boundaries ofculture, class, educa-tion, income, ethnicity,and age.^ (United Nations Children’sFund, “Domestic Violence Against Women andGirls,” Innocenti Digest, No. 6, May 2000)