REV 7/2015
Week 11: Handout A
TYPES OF LOVE
Love [luhv] noun, verb, loved, loving.
noun
1. a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.
2. a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child,
or friend.
Healthy vs. Unhealthy Love:
Here is a short list of the characteristics of Love vs. toxic love (compiled with the help of the
work of Melody Beattie, Terence Gorski. and Robert Burney.)
Healthy -----------------------------------------Unhealthy
Love: Development of self first priority.
Toxic love: Obsession with relationship.
Love: Room to grow, expand; desire for
other to grow.
Toxic love: Security, comfort in sameness;
intensity of need seen as proof of love –
may really be fear, insecurity, loneliness.
Love: Separate interests; other friends;
maintain other meaningful relationships.
Toxic love: Total involvement; limited
social life; neglect old friends, interests.
Love: Encouragement of each other's
expanding; secure in own worth.
Toxic love: Preoccupation with other's
behavior; fear of other changing.
Love: Appropriate Trust (trusting partner to
behave according to fundamental nature.)
Toxic love: Jealousy; possessiveness; fear
of competition; protects "supply."
Love: Compromise, negotiation or taking
turns at leading. Problem solving together.
Toxic love: Power plays for control;
blaming; passive or aggressive manipulation.
